Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
We smell like vodka and hangover
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