Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
