the condom got lost in my hair
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
