can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize