either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
