I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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