Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
