i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I will pee on everything he values.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Randomize
