Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
