Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
We had sex on a dog bed..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize