around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
How's work?
Spinning.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
