Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
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And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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