Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
