I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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