They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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