What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize