There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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