just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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