The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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