Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
