Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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