I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
