i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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