They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
