well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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