Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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