But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She is in my trunk
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
