There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize