He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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