He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize