If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
as a side note pls kill me
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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