I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
