No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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