Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
