I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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