Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
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