you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
