Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Operation Purity has been aborted
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
