You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
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