He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
