you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
