you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
