Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
