Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
the raccoons are back...
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