your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
