Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
you didnt know i had herpes?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
