There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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