see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
this is an emotional support booty call
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize