I saw his package. It spoke to me.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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