So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
